Drive on a Parkway, Park in a Driveway

Are you a fan of life’s little oddities and oxymorons? I am too, so I’ve decided to dig way back into the not-so-vast canyons of my brain and find some humorous oxymorons. Most of these are probably ones you’ve never really thought about before, so prepare to be amazed that you never realized that things you see and hear every day are in fact oxymorons! Here goes…

Accurate estimate, act naturally, bitter sweet, bigger half, certain risk, clearly confused, Civil War, cold sweat, critical acclaim, crash landing, deaf listener, deliberately thoughtless, demanding patient, escaped inmate, extended deadline, elementary calculus, even odds…

Laughing yet?

False fact, freezer burn, fast walk, future history, good grief, genuine fake, greater evil, go ahead and back up, graduate student, great depression, going nowhere, good beating, halfway done, happily married, hell’s angels, harmless crime, huge shortage, high ground, head butt…

It goes on and on…

Income tax, ill health, insane logic, initial results, inside out, jumbo shrimp, ladies man, lamp shade, low altitude, less is more, living fossil, live recording…

I’ve got a lot of time on my hands, I know…

Little bit big, lesser evil, loose knot, marital bliss, midnight sun, more perfect, medium large, Microsoft Works, mighty weak, worst favorite, moving target, negative gain, new cliche, new tradition, never again, non-stick velcro…

I could go all the way to Z in this post, but I realize that it would make the post become too long. I will continue it on a day to be named later. If there were a few of the ones above that you liked in particular, please tell me about them in a comment so that I can put those oxymorons in bold for others to enjoy.